In January I saw a post on a local mom's group calling for writers to audition for the Listen to your Mother Boulder show. A huge knot formed in my stomach as I emailed to schedule an audition time. What if they thought I was horrible? What if I made a joke of myself? I mean, I write, but am I really a writer?
As soon as I read about the Boulder show I knew the story I wanted to tell. Way back in 11th grade I wrote a simple story about my mom. I knew that version would never cut the mustard. The story poured out but it still wasn't good enough. After five drafts, late night inspiration struck and the story was written.
Interestingly, I wasn't nervous for the audition. After all, I'm not really a writer so what is the harm in trying. But the day the email arrived saying I was chosen for the cast, joy filled me. Someone liked what I wrote. My words made an impact.
However, the day of the first rehearsal, I was nervous. I felt like a little girl dressed in an oversized bridesmaid's dress. What if they made a mistake? What if they didn't actually mean to chose me and just got confused?
The rehearsal was outstanding. The room was filled with women of all ages and one man, a college sophomore. This group is solid. Business owners, professionals, mothers, daughters, mourners and saints. Beauty shared through our written words.
We each read our stories in the order we will present our work during the show. I follow the college student and then a mother of teenagers. Somehow the combination of these two stories left me weeping right before it was time to share my simple little story. We are talking full on ugly cry. The rawness, venerability and love touched my soul.
Truth be told, I was scared to death to read my story. It seemed insignificant in comparison to the magnitude of the words already spoken by the writers in the room. Yet, I read my story and the beautiful people in the room received it with loving grace.
I am humbled to be a part of this group of talented writers. The stories shared are beautiful. Each one captures a moment about being a mom, loving a mom, or just trying to survive childhood with a mother. They are funny, sad, hopeful and extremely honest and real.
Am I a writer? I am still not sure, but in that room on that night I sure felt like one.
"Full on ugly cry" I love it! I am beginning to suspect all writers wonder if they are actually writers.
ReplyDelete