Happy Birthday Grace

Our sweet Grace is now one. 2011 was a very interesting year. If I had to describe it in one word it would be exhausting. With all of the challenges 2011 presented it also gave us one of life's biggest blessings, a daughter. Our second child. Sweet Grace.

Grace was named perfectly. We didn't know it at the time of course, but this year Grace lived her name. She definitely taught us about the true meaning of grace as she demonstrated toughness and resilience.

As much as I hate hip dysplasia, surgeries, spica casts, braces and doctor's appointments; I know that by walking through this health challenge with Grace I got to experience her character and personality at a much earlier stage than I otherwise would have. Grace is tough. She is not deterred by physical trials. In this short year Grace has taught me so much about motherhood and strength. I am so thankful for her and feel privileged to be her mom.

Grace is a special child. She is peaceful and sweet but also has a lot of fight. Grace never fusses much. Even with the braces and the casts she never cried about it unless she was hot or in pain. However, in December after she was released from wearing the brace during the day, the first night I put the brace on her for sleep she threw a huge fit. If you know Grace you know this is odd behavior for her. I wandered if it was hurting her somehow but could find no signs of discomfort. After a few nights of throwing a fit I realized that she wanted me to know that she did not want to be in the brace. That was Grace showing her fight.

Grace has come a long way in just two months of freedom. She is crawling, pulling herself up, climbing stairs and powering her way up the couch cushions to play jungle gym with Jack. I am so proud of her determination. Today we were at story time at the library with other babies that were walking and Grace spent the entire time trying to stand up in the middle of the floor. She didn't manage to get herself up independently but I would bet that she will figure it out soon.

Grace changed me. I am a different mother and woman because of her. My circle is smaller but my heart is bigger. She inspires me to want more from myself. She has raised my personal conduct standard. She has shown me that determination pays off. She has taught me that you do not have to whine just because life feels hard.

Christian's grandmother passed away last week and the funeral service was very inspiring. One particular line that made me think about our year with Grace was when the priest said that we are not promised life without challenges and that those challenges are really just life at its most honest. Well, our lives have been really honest this year. We are not promised health, good fortune or happy endings. But I did receive life's grace this year in a very real way.

I love my sweet girl. She is one of the three loves of my life. My heart is so full and I do not deserve the beauty Grace, Jack and Christian bring to my life. They teach me so much and give my life such purpose.

Grace is a gift to our family and I am excited to watch her grow. She is going to have a fun year. Happy first year Gracie! You are an amazing little girl and wonderful person. We love you!

Jack is Three

Last week my sweet baby boy turned three. I have often heard that three is a hard age for parents; "it isn't the terrible twos, it is the terrible threes". Well, I have to disagree. I love Jack at three! He is funny, cute, lovable and sweet. He says precious things like, "Mommy's pretty" and "I love Gracie." He laughs at toots and boogers. He is rambunctious and full of energy.

A few months ago Jack found not one but two imaginary friends. The first one to arrive was DooDoo. Yep, I said DooDoo. I believe this name developed because Jack must have heard the word doodoo somewhere and kept bringing it up in conversation. I would simply say, "What is doodoo?" This went on for a few weeks when all of a sudden Jack began talking about his friend DooDoo. DooDoo comes over to play and Jack has me open the front door to let him in. Interestingly, DooDoo has a little sister too.

Jack's second imaginary friend is Scratchy Monster. He got this one off of a cartoon where the main character had a scratchy monster under his bed. One night Jack magically had Scratchy Monster under his bed too. Now each night Christian has to take Scratchy Monster out of Jack's room and throw him in the garbage. We love to pretend with Jack and even invited Scratchy Monster to breakfast one morning.

Scratchy Monster was in the booster seat

I totally stole this from a friend's blog. Here are a few questions I asked Jack last night in order to record what his little brain is thinking at age three.

Me: What is your favorite color?

Jack: green

Me: What is your favorite food?

Jack: mac-n-cheese

Me: What is your favorite toy?

Jack: fire engine

Me: Who is your best friend?

Jack: I like Isaac but I really like Luna

Me: What is your favorite thing to do?

Jack: I like gymnastics

Me: What do you want to do when you grow up?

Jack: Work with big guys.

Me: Yes, but what do you want to be when you grow up?

Jack: Daddy

Me: What are you most thankful for?

Jack: Daddy

This little question and answer session was a lot fun. I plan to do this every year (until he is old enough to think I am super lame and refuse to participate), and can't wait to compare his answers to previous years.

Jack and Christian making candy cane cookies

Jack is a has a gentle nature and often takes a few minutes to warm up in a new situation. He loves trucks, trains, tractors and cars. Fire engines and rescue ambulances are his current favorites. He is a kind child but also has a stubborn streak and knows how to be sassy (I don't know where that could have come from).

Jack fills our home with giggles and joy and love. We are so excited to watch him grow and learn and be during this year of three.

The Season of Giving

My kids and I share something in common, we all have birthdays within a month of Christmas. This means that we get a lot of stuff all at once and it can be hard to find a standout gift for us. This year I received lots of fun presents for my birthday: gift cards, cash, an awesome camera from my husband, tons of cards, calls and well wishes. I felt very loved this year.

As you all know it is the time of year where we are trying to find something special for our loved ones and often times people need nothing and don't want more junk cluttering up there space but you want to do something so they know you care. Here are two awesome gifts I received for my birthday this year that may just help you think of your own awesome ideas for a few of the people on your list.

First, let me say that one of the reasons I LOVED both of these was they were completely unexpected but given from the heart.

My very dear friend Annika is a stay-at-home mom on a budget. I love that she prioritizes staying home with her beautiful daughter over society's push to have us all believe we must compete financially with the "Jones." Annika is kind, funny, generous, honest and a really great mom. She is one of those friends that you count yourself lucky to have. She never gossips, doesn't participate in competitive woman drama and tells you straight up if you cross a line. I love people like that!

For my birthday this year Annika surprised me with a copy of "Joy of Cooking". It is the perfect gift for me. She knew I did not have it because a few months ago I wanted a copy a bread recipe and she told me it was from "Joy" and I told her I didn't own that cookbook. She remembered.

Now what you also must know is that I love cookbooks. I read them like novels and as you can see I have been reading this one at night before sleep. The tip here is to take the time to find out what a person enjoys, what they do not have and what they would actually use when buying a gift. I know it is tempting to buy what you find on sale or what matches your taste but really if you are going to give a gift, and you actually like the person, take the extra time to make it about them.

The second really standout gift this year was from my mother-in-law's neighbor Dianne. I have only met Dianne a few times but she is one of those people who never meets a stranger. Jack took to her right away too and he is the kid that takes a long time to warm up to people. This summer while I was struggling with my own health stuff and dealing with Grace's hip dysplasia, Dianne sent a very sweet and encouraging card. I was completely surprised when I received this in the mail from Dianne for my birthday.

Dianne made a card with 34 positive things that describe how she sees me. What a great gift! This is a wonderful gift for any holiday and is perfect for mother's day, birthdays, Christmas, get well soons, or just a random note to let someone know you are thinking of them. I mean really folks, who wouldn't like to hear the nice things people think about you. I am totally stealing this idea. And as you know, I had a rough year and did not handle it as gracefully as I would have liked and this gift was a very sweet reminder that along with my bag of bad habits and less than ideal personality traits, there are a few good things that people see in me too. I am going to hang this on the wall in my closet so that I can see it each morning as I get ready this year.

I hope these gifts from my generous friends will inspire you to get creative during this year's giving season.

Blessed this Christmas

Yesterday as I drove Grace to her orthopedic appointment tears welled up in my eyes. Hoping for the best but prepared for the worst, I carried a load of anxiety. You could feel the tension in the air. I knew tears were about to fall but I needed to be strong. Whenever I am overly weak in a moment where strength is required, I think of the saying, "put on your big girl panties." This always makes me smile because I think of putting on one of those big pairs of satin undies that go up to your bellybutton that I am sure all of our grandmothers wore when we were kids. The thought helped dry my wet eyes but I needed more. I could not cry in front of Grace's surgeon again. And so I started to pray and this is what I said to God.

Dear God, you have shown me so much grace and I am grateful. I know you have already raised me from ashes. You have given me a life of plenty, of more than I could have ever hoped for. I know I don't deserve to ask for anything ever again. I know. And I know that my sweet girl is lucky. She was born into a place where she is safe and loved and the world is hers for the taking. You have given her so much. We are thankful. Lord, I am grateful and I know our one problem is so small compared to what so many other children and mothers face. I know. Grace has bad hips and we have access to the best care and money to pay for that care while there are mothers in this world with perfectly healthy babies that die because they do not have food or basic medicine. I know. So I come humbly God before you to ask for your favor to heal my sweet girl's hips. If that is not the case Lord, help us to have peaceful hearts and strength as we move through the next few hours and months. Thank you God and help me to be a strong mama today. Amen.

I have said many prayers since this journey started with Grace but none quite so truthful as the one I said yesterday. Christian arrived at the appointment as Grace and I were walking in and together we waited, took x-rays with a screaming Grace, and waited some more.

Finally our surgeon came in with a smile and told us that the x-rays looked great. Grace's hips look like normal hips. She can be out of the brace during waking hours and only needs to wear the brace at night and during naps. We hugged Grace, we kissed each other, we smiled and we were thankful.

As we sat down to dinner an hour later with our little family all in our chairs in our breakfast nook, we took a moment to thank God for this blessing. Thank you God for showing Grace your favor. We are grateful.

Our journey with the hips doesn't end here. In three months we return for additional x-rays and discussion about next steps. We will return for check-ups until Grace stops growing. Depending on Grace's growth and progress out of the brace we may still have surgeries to face. Regardless, we are going to turn our faces to the sun and move forward.

Today Grace has been trying to crawl. She is managing to move herself across the room and even rolled over from her back to her tummy for the first time in her life. We are so excited to see her develop and learn. We are thankful and happy and blessed.

Our Snowy Morning

Y'all, it is cold outside! Today is one of those cold, snowy Colorado days that makes me want to stay home and snuggle with my babies.

While Gracie napped this morning Jack found some loose change and we talked about pennies, dimes, nickels and quarters. Jack is most impressed with the penny.

We then setup the wooden railway on the living room floor. This SUV barely missed a major collision.

Once Gracie woke up, we headed outside to play. Getting three people ready to play in the snow was way more worked than I thought but it was worth it.

Gracie had fun watching Jack play.

Jack had fun "swimming" in the snow.

We warmed up with hot chocolate and a tea party in Grace's room.

Jack thought he would nap under Grace's bed until...

Grace decided she wanted to join him.

So long everyone. Stay warm!